He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
Randomize
