she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
i don't know whats more disturbing, that his dog drooled directly into my mouth or that i was too drunk and tired to do anything except let it be there.
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
Randomize
