I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
Randomize
