I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
Randomize
