David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
so my 6 year old came home from school and asked me if he was a bastard cause the kids at school called him one, i told him to call them a clit. those parents will hate me
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
Randomize
