I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
haha omg you stole $185 from a passed out drunk indian on your porch and called the ambulance??
savin' lives aint cheap
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
A+ Viking dick
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
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