good news, i'm not pregnant. bad news, i had sex with ***** last night and i think i'd rather be pregnant
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Randomize
