yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
They get 5 minutes to wear their speedos at the wedding
Oh my god I'll have to be really drunk for that
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
They just built a gym in the same parking lot as my favorite bar. Drunk me is gonna be so excited.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
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