Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
Randomize
