Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
She offered to make me a fruit roll up salad for breakfast...I'm not sure if that's the coolest or weirdest thing ever...
my brother wants to know why there are wet balloons in his bed and i think you forgot to throw the condoms away but im too hungover to check if thats what hes talking about
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
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