I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
Right now I'm laying face down on my carpet in my living room in the darkness sending work emails from my phone.
It's a glamorous life.
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Randomize
