I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
Randomize
