at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
she texted me 'with freud,' which i thought was drunk for 'i'm with my friend.' but nope, she was actually on a statue of the psychologist sigmund freud.
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
Randomize
