:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
you had me at cake vodka
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
Randomize
