Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
Randomize
