They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
Buying a large dominoes pizza for a wasted 3 mile walk is the best bad idea ever. My mouth is on fire, probably broke my hand, and i may or may not have eaten street pizza.
How did you break your hand eating pizza?
Boxes are hard to see rocks through.
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
It's pizza for people who hate themselves. I rang the place up once i'd finished and told them if i was on death row it would be my last meal because by the time i'd got half way through it I would be begging to die.
But then I ordered two more because it was 2-4-1 and my life is a mess
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
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