white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
Randomize