his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
I'm in my boyfriends bathroom and I shit so bad, there was no toilet paper but his mom's clothes were on the floor and I wiped my butt on her underwear... now it looks like she sharted
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
IF THE GUY WHO I AM BORROWING OUR CAR FROM FINDS ONE CONDOM OR JIZZ STAIN IN THIS CAR HE IS GOING TO CASTRATE MY ASS. SERIOUSLY, DON'T FUCK IN THE CAR.
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
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