He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
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