As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
apparently i'm really good at getting wasted, having sex all night, getting multiple hickeys and oversleeping father's day brunch. this is the third year its happened.
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
So it took me 20 minutes to figure out that this is the wrong blind date. I'm going to go with it, he's cute and at least it's free beer.
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
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