Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
What part of "waking up in the crawl space of my house with a raccoon" sounds like a good night to you?
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
I did it again.
I drunk texted John McCain.
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
