Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
Your penis caused this!
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
Randomize
