If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
Randomize
