I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
Your dad just texted me? He said I needed to holler at him when I get up tomorrow. I honestly thought you had somehow gone to jail.
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
Randomize