That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
Randomize
