Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
My cat puked at the same time as me. Makes me feel better about myself, except he can stand and I can't.
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
Like if Robert Downey Jr. and Kiefer Sutherland got together for a bender, that's how drunk I want us to be.
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
"just because you look like a short version of scarlet johanson does not mean I would immediately fuck you" that was the single.most difficult thing to say. but seriously I don't want the roots of the whore tree anywhere near my junk.
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
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