As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
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