were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
Randomize
