I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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