My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
Stumbled out of my bed this morning into the bathroom at 8 am still drunk, obviously. The Mormon on my floor was in the bathroom. I could practically hear her doing hail marys for me.
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
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