i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
luckily my workout playlist doubles as a masturbation playlist.
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
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