I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
When you're a bigshot ER surgeon and I'm a starving artist, I want you to remember who held your hair last night.
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
Randomize
