we're blogging at a bar
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
I went to the obgyn with chipped nail polish.. Somewhere Beyonce was looking down, shaking her head, whispering "Not fierce."
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
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