i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
Why is there a cactus in the microwave?
Don't worry about it.
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
Randomize
