Will you take my knitting needle, stick it far up my nose, reach in my frontal lobe and give it a few swirls?
I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear.
Guess she heard her killer coming
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
