Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
Just faked two orgasms bc I had too much wine and remembered mid sex that I bought doritos yesterday.
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
Randomize
