Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
Pappa wants mamma naked
I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
apparently the secret to your success is patron
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
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