Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
should my penis look like a turkey
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
Randomize
