Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
i miss you and i wish you were peeing between my legs right now. in a platonic way
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
your mascara is on the toilet seat from when you fell asleep last night
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
Randomize