Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
So instead of getting the if-you-hurt-my-little-girl-youre-dead talk, i got the alcohol-is-our-friend talk, i like her dad already
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
Hold on...did you Instagram a picture of you and your boyfriend while you were sending me dirty snapchats?
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
Randomize
