you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
Dude at the bar last night came into the bathroom, drop kicked the stall open and start saying lines from happy Gilmore as he was shitting, "go in your home! Are you too good for your home?!"
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
Randomize
