am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Randomize