i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
I just found a bag of teeth...
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
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