Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
My tub is filled with twinkies which would be awesome if they were still wrapped and not floating in a mixture of bath water and what appears to be vomit.
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
Oh god it's open bar.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
After we won that round of beer pong you attempted to swallow the winning ball whole claiming you had the mouth and jaw of a snake.
A snake? I must've been gone...
After that you got naked and hissed at people the rest of the night..
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
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