something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
The president of the frat said he was honored to award me "Best Overall Blow Jobs", free admission to all their future parties, and a $20 gift certificate to Denny's. I'm not sure if I feel proud or if that's just the burrito coming back up...
Also, what are the symptoms of syphilis?
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
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