Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
Randomize
