It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
i just found my sim card.....i hid it in my tylenol bottle....i guess to ensure i would find it mid-hangover
you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
Randomize
