is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
She's making her own pesto again. Cooking spaghetti in the microwave and "frying" vegetables in the toaster oven. All this while wearing the yellow rubber gloves and saying that the pesto has feelings like a real person. Im terrified.
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
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