The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
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