summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
Just managed to stab myself in the ass with a fork. I feel that as my best friend, I'm obligated by friend code to inform you of that sort of thing.
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
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