Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
I know her cup size but not her name....
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